My Creative Outlet

So lately I've been extremely stressed. Trying to take care of two little ones and myself all on my own is just taxing. We're officially 4 months in to this deployment. In that sense I feel pretty refreshed and relieved. 'Cause that means we only have about 2.9 months left. Hahahah.

I'm constantly trying to find ways to release my stress. Photography is probably my most beneficial outlet. Not only does it allow me to decompress but I get to capture beautiful memories of my boys in the process.

I have several exciting things planned for when daddy gets home from deployment. I won't be sharing them 'til just yet though.

Here are some pictures from today. Hope you enjoy.

Wave Church

Ive had the privilege of shooting with the photography team at wave church during some special events theyve held. I thought I'd include a couple of the images ive been able to capture while there. Hope you enjoy!

Grasshoppers

It's been quite a bit since I posted my last entry. It's funny how lots has happened but at the same time not. Maddox is starting preschool this September, we've gotten into a routine, spent time with friends and family, sent daddy several care packages, and Travis has had multiple surgery follow up appts. Everything looks great and the boys and myself are just trying to make the most of the summer. We played in the backyard this morning and found this ginormous grasshopper. Travis kept pointing at him and Maddox kept preventing him from getting closer. Here are some images to show.

Happy Monday!

See ya soon then...

The end of this year to be exact. Oh how i'll miss you. You're hugs and kisses, you're loving voice, and all you do around the house. I'll miss watching movies on the couch and texting you to bring some pizza on the way home. 

The kids will miss you for sure. Your silly jokes and wrestling. You're an awesome man all around. 

Praying that although we're apart physically God keeps us connected spiritually and emotionally. Praying we can grow together and individually but definitely not apart.

Love you more than you know.

See you soon then...

Travis' First Birthday

I can't believe it will be a whole year since you've been in our lives. When I try to think back of a time before you it's almost unimaginable. This first year of being your mom has been such a whirlwind of emotions. I feel so excited and proud of all you have overcome in just this short little year of life.

You've taught me oh so much about life, faith, and even myself. I'm definitely much tougher than I give myself credit for. I remember thinking back and how we'd dream about what it'd be like to have another baby. Then I found out I was pregnant. Then you were born and we faced some of the hardest moments and greatest victories of our lives.

I was so scared when we heard the news about your birth defects. I felt robbed. Robbed of a blissful post-delivery experience. I remember crying in the recovery room because I could hear other babies and I was baby less. You had already been sent off to the CHKD nicu. It was so painful but little did I know that God was mending the whole situation. In this short little year you've had two successful surgeries. And are thriving and doing so well.

I do not know what the future holds but I'm so grateful for you. I love you so much. My prayer for you this year is that you continue to grow and develop to you fullest potential. I pray that God always be the center of your life and that you love Him with all your heart. I pray for your protection and I speak health and abundance over this little life of yours. Happy 1st Birthday Travis!

Maddox Turns 4

We had Maddox 4th birthday party last week. It was at our house and I really wanted to try making the decor myself. I love crafting and creating. I think thats why I enjoy cooking and building stuff because it's sort of an outlet for me. I also like serving people.

Anywho we didn't have a huge crowd of people but just the right amount. I had rolls and bagels along with deli meat for sandwiches. I also had some Digorno for the kids (not shown in the images). I didn't want to set up the more perishable stuff until people had actually started to arrive.

I did make the party hats as well using scrapbooking paper or cardstock (from michaels and ac moore). For party favors I packed some play doh in tissue paper. Everyone seemed to really enjoy themselves and we did too. I'm grateful for all those who came out to celebrate. Most of the serveware I got from Homegoods(which is my SPOT) on clearance.

First.

That's the title of the song I've had on my heart this last day or so. Its sung by Lauren Daigle who is an awesome christian artist. She is a former American Idol contestant. Several of her songs have popped up on Pandora when I'm listening.

I find it so interesting how the Holy Spirit speaks to us. Sometimes through something we have come across over and over again but it isn't relevant until that particular moment. Like this song for example. How many times have I skipped it on Pandora in the past. Well the words really called out to me recently. It starts off first "before I bring my need I will bring my heart, before I lift my cares I will lift my arms". How good is that? It was such a good reminder to me. Especially as I'm really learning on how to grow my prayer life.

It is a reminder that although Matthew 7:7 says "Keep on asking, and you will receive what you ask for. Keep on seeking, and you will find. Keep on knocking, and the door will be opened to you." We should remember to seek his face and worship him before anything. His presence alone can equip us with everything we need to face life's challenges. Its such a good song I recommend checking it out "First" by Lauren Daigle. 

It's probably safe to say she is one of my favorite artists now because another one of my songs from her is "Here's my Heart". 

10 Months New

Is exactly what I am. I'm definitely not the same person I was 10 months ago. I remember when I was pregnant with Travis and I would wonder how different I'd become. I always heard you change when you go from being a mother of 1 to a mother of 2. When you think you can't love your next child anymore your heart just grows. I guess that's a way to put it. 

In our circumstances I feel I did twice as much growing. These past 10 months have taught me way more than I expected. I thought I had grown patient but I had more to grow in that department. I've learned to have faith too. I was always a believer in God. With everything Travis has experienced and we as a family, made me grow even more faith. 

We have this hope as an anchor for the soul, firm and secure. It enters the inner sanctuary behind the curtain,
where our forerunner, Jesus, has entered on our behalf. 

Hebrews 6:19-20

Travis had his follow up appointment with the geneticist today at CHKD. She's so sweet and knowledgeable. She was so happy to see us and said how much Travis had grown. That he was developing beautifully. She even held him and gave him little kisses. That is a total reminder of how faithful my God is. We are now able to see her yearly. Just to continue to make sure he's doing well. 

I feel a need to ask if you are reading this and hopelessness has taken over, you're experiencing something, or believing for something in particular. Message me so we can pray together. Esperanza1461@aol.com, on IG, or even Facebook! 

Hugs!!!

Life These Days

Thought I'd make a blog post and include some images from this morning. A little info on how my days have been lately with just the kiddies. Especially since daddy is away on the ship. Theyre getting ready for an upcoming deployment this year.

I'm taking this as a sort of practice for when the deployment does get here. So many different emotions going on in my head. Mainly because my honey is usually so involved in our day to day lives. We do everything together. I really do consider him my best friend.

So I've been trying to find a new normal for us. Making lots of lists, schedules, and changes to make sure we get to everything. It also helps me stay busy and in the moment. As opposed to focusing on the fact that he isn't here, ya know?

Well we've been taking on several projects around the house. The most recent was adding to a gallery wall in the boys room. My plan was to add shelves but they just didnt work out. I ended up just leaving them on the ground and using them as a book racks instead.

They were unfinished oak and I stained them with a weather wood color and painted the interior an aqua color. I'm including some photos of the attempt at putting them up haha. It's really just pictures of the boys fooling around. Enjoy!